ETHER

As the ether slowly enters my blood stream via nasal ingestion, I await and welcome death. I gnash my teeth until they chip and break. Reasonable thinking and all logic have come to pass. I fear there is nothing left but total annihilation. The pills make me rip through my skin only to pay for it later in agony. My senses dull and blur. Serotonin becomes toxic and unable to preform a general task of allowing the frontal lobes to function as needed. The familiar foul stench of my self inflicted demise consumes me. My blood pumps violently through a cold, vengeful heart. Self preservation instincts have failed and no longer do they pester my unrational and flawed mind. This world no longer calls for me as I no longer yearn its sociopathic indifference. I have strong armed death on many occasion and prevailed the victor. But now I choke upon the ashes of broken promises and complete failure. I have allowed hate and false persistence to fuel my rage. I am not blind to who I am or my sociological impact. Instead, unlike most others, I have accepted and embraced the unrelenting truth of the zero impact I have made on society. Chemically bound to this state of true paranoia, reality is nothing but regurgitated remnants of frailty and shear misunderstanding. It no longer haunts my waking hours. Instead, it has dissipated, decayed and returned to those who need it most. I have excepted my fate. Merciful it is not, but slow, painful and torturous. Only the wicked and black hearted are welcome here. My eyes slowly roll the the back of my head and muscles twitch with anticipation. The savage beasts of my mind tear away at the skin, for where I am to end up, only they know. It is time for my understudy to take the lead as it has sabotaged and poisoned my ability to decipher the ever so important line between right and wrong. Unlike Atlas, this world has broken my back and like god to Lucifer, has forsaken my soul and left me with life in a living hell. ....to be continued